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October 30, 2004

Days of Old When Rants Were Rants

In the "old days" when the Internet was the arpanet, uucp and bitnet, and a few crazed individuals trying to be big fish in small ponds, and gain fame in the world of miscreants, there existed an environment that cannot ever be recreated. Those were the innocent days of flame wars with no prisoners, top 25 most voluminous lists, and Rich Rosen. Back then, the concept of a "computer lawyer" was ludicrous. The idea of suing people for libel based on Usenet postings was unthinkable. And just about anyone with a Sun in their basement could and did become an ISP.

For better or for worse, those ranters of old are forever archived (at least back til about 1985) on Google Groups. As I am proud to have been one of those early Dark Ranters, I am picking out some of my favorite rants from self and others, in order to 1) prove I was actually there, and 2) that this was actually FUN! In a way, I miss it. In another way... well, I have a lot of other stuff I can do with the time :-)

So just scroll on over to the "historical" category and have a look. Presented for your amusement :-)

Idiots Think They Can Pardon Murder

From AP we have another story of people who want to feel better about the bad things their ancestors pulled, so they touch murder on the head with a Rainbow Brite wand in hopes that the sun shines out their butts. Yep, cynical I am indeed. Somehow I doubt those poor women, children and cats that were killed by these looneys are quite so quick to forgive. It's too bad they weren't really witches, they might have done some seriously good curses.

By CATERINE McALOON

LONDON (AP) - A Scottish township plans to mark Halloween by officially pardoning 81 people - and their cats - executed centuries ago for being witches.

"There'll be no witches' hats, dress-ups or that sort of thing - it will be a fairly solemn occasion," Adele Conn, spokeswoman for the baronial court that granted the pardons, said in a telephone interview Friday.

Sunday's ceremony in Prestonpans will publicly declare pardons for 81 people executed in the 16th and 17th centuries. The pardons were granted under ancient feudal powers due to be abolished within weeks.

More than 3,500 Scots, mainly women and children, and their cats were killed in witch hunts at a time of political intrigue and religious excess. Many were condemned on flimsy evidence, such as owning a black cat or brewing homemade remedies.

Prestonpans has recorded one of the largest numbers of witch executions in all of Scotland, said Conn, spokeswoman for the Barons Courts of Prestoungrange & Dolphinstoun.

She said Gordon Prestoungrange, the 14th baron, granted the pardons in the last session of his court, which is due to be abolished on Nov. 28.

"'Most of those persons condemned for witchcraft within the jurisdiction of the Baron Courts of Prestoungrange and Dolphinstoun were convicted on the basis of spectral evidence - that is to say, prosecuting witnesses declared that they felt the presence of evil sprits or heard spirit voices,'" the court said in its written findings.

"Such spectral evidence is impossible to prove or to disprove; nor is it possible for the accused to cross-examine the spirit concerned. One is convicted upon the very making of such charges without any possibility of offering a defense."

The court declared pardon to all those convicted, "as well as to the cats concerned."

Conn said 15 local descendants of executed witches had been invited to attend the ceremony and an inaugural Witches' Remembrance Day, which will become an annual event in the township each Halloween.

"It's too late to apologize, but it's a sort of symbolic recognition that these people were put to death for hysterical ignorance and paranoia," said historian Roy Pugh, who presented evidence to the court in support of the pardons.

The last execution for witchcraft in Scotland was in 1727. Such cases were outlawed by the Witchcraft Act of 1735, which made it a crime only to pretend to be a witch.

Amongst Today's Rants...

Today I would like to rant on idiot copyright thieves. What can these people POSSIBLY be thinking when they take another person's entire work, such as a glossary of pagan terms that it took months of research to compile, and then slap THEIR name on it and pretend that it was theirs all along? What kind of downright lame and brainless critter steals wholesale the work of another, thinking that they can pass it off as their own? Do they think we're STUPID and can't do an Internet search to find out when they've stolen our stuff? Yeah, likely so. After all, if they're STUPID enough to steal in the first place without bothering to try to create their own, they must believe we're stupid enough to tolerate it.

Grrrrrrrrrrr.

Dark Rantings is BACK

After abject lameness, Dark Rantings is BACK in all its glory. There will no longer be any doubt as to where the most rantingest rants one could possibly rant can be found. Here, of course, along with the ambiguity located in the box under the bed.

Yes, we will continue ranting on, and leaving comments on until the evil spam commenters find us again and cause me to have to turn them on. So, until then....party on dudes.